Do you know anybody who seems to brighten every room that they enter? Who puts a smile on most everybody’s face? Who exhibits such warmth and sincerity that people can’t help but to think of them as a friend?
If you aspire to have this kind of amiable air about you, there are numerous things you can do on a daily basis to be a friend to all. Consider the simple, practical pointers below as you seek to befriend those around you.
- Turn that frown upside down. One of the easiest steps we can take is to don a smile as we engage with others. A smile serves as a non-verbal gesture of welcome and, often, as an invitation into conversation. It’s where rapport is first sought and relationships first begin.
- Offer sincere encouragement. Give expression to what you truly admire and appreciate in those around you. If you have an opportunity to share a word of affirmation, do so — and do so regularly. You’ll undoubtedly improve the day of the person you compliment.
- Honor others’ time and worth. Always regard others with respect, recognizing that their hours and perspectives are as valuable as your own. Be punctual, receptive, and humble.
- Don’t take yourself too seriously. Being able to laugh at yourself is one of the most disarming qualities you can have. When people realize that you can take a joke at your own expense, they don’t feel as though they have to walk on eggshells in your presence. It’s a freeing thing — both for you and others.
- Be genuinely curious. Pepper your conversations with questions that draw people out of their shells, and provide them with a space to share about themselves. Your sincere interest in what they have to say will likely strike them as refreshing in the midst of our “I”-centric culture.
- Refrain from gossip. Nothing quite so stymies potential friendships as spreading slander and rumors. If you talk about others behind their backs, it will become increasingly difficult for people to trust you. They’ll know that what they convey to you in confidence could be shared with and misrepresented to others.
- Know the importance of names. Work to learn, retain, and correctly pronounce the names of those around you. This reminds and reassures people that you see, know, and care for them.
- Model transparency. Be willing to admit and speak candidly about struggles you face. While you should certainly use discretion as to what you do and don’t share, your willingness to be open will likely inspire others to do the same, enabling you to get to know them on a more meaningful level.
- Show your enthusiasm. If there’s something that you’re passionate and excited about, invite others into your passion and excitement. They’ll feed off your energy and perhaps even develop an interest of their own. Almost surely, it’ll encourage them to pursue and share their passions, as well.
- Recognize the power of presence. Eliminate distractions as you engage with others. That means resisting a glance at your phone, of course, but it also means maintaining eye contact as best you can and demonstrating other forms of active listening. People can easily read when you are checked out of the conversation or your thoughts are elsewhere.
Friendships add extraordinary richness and fulfillment to our lives. If we desire to make friends and to be considered a friend, these starting steps are at our disposal.
Shall we begin?
